Do we see the magic? 

There is so much around us that we do not see.  Do we want to see it? Do we ignore the signs? Or do we just not believe in magic or wonder anymore? Last year I had decided as a New Year resolution I would only focus on being the best human being I can be. This caused me to pay attention to all aspects of myself. How did I behave? What were my thoughts? As I moved through my journey of self-discovery it was really important to hold up that mirror and really look at myself and not to look at what others are doing, that is none of my business.  I am not here to tell someone how they need to be, unless they ask.  Then I would introduce another perspective and it would be up to them. 

When I started this incredible journey I had to establish what being the best human being meant to me and what I kept coming back to was “Heart”. That was it! I wanted to live in my heart as much as possible.  Then the journey began.  When anything would happen and if the reaction was negative I would take that mirror and ask, “Why?” Why am I behaving or feeling this way? Then I would go through the steps that I created for myself. 

The first step is definitely “The Mirror”, which helps you take a hard long look at your feelings and reactions.  If you get upset to how someone behaves or reacts to you or treats you, LOOK!  Not at them but at you! I promise the more you get into this exercise you will start to see a pattern.  One very important thing is not to get upset with yourself.  This is not an exercise to punish, feel shame or blame yourself.  It is an exercise to open yourself to the amazing individual you are and live heart centered.  I know it starts with us.  I have mentioned before we are not perfect, we are human, why not try to be the best human you can be? This is my goal.  Also important to remember is that this exercise is about looking within yourself.  Once we are able to look at ourselves with open eyes it is much easier to move forward.  I used to think and say why are they being that way? Then I began to realize they are being and doing the best THEY know how.  My lesson is if I did not like their behavior then what can I do to be different.  Learn from it do not judge it! Do not keep paying attention to their faults.  Not your story and not your lessons.  Pay attention to you and your own behaviors.  This is definitely the first step to self-awareness and becoming your authentic self.  

Join me on this challenge of becoming your authentic self! Will I tell you that it is easy, absolutely not! Will I tell you that it is worth it? Absolutely! When we start to become self-aware, it is incredible how there will be some aspects that are work and other aspects of self that will just dwindle away so easily once you become aware. You will even wonder, how I ever allowed that to bother or upset me before.  It is definitely a time to become YOU!

Step one… The Mirror.  Look at yourself and start becoming self-aware.  Remember, No Judgment, this is not an exercise to punish yourself.  It is an exercise to look at yourself and be aware to start seeing the magic. Then we will look at how to let go and lastly expansion.  Imagine a new perspective. Imagine understanding yourself at another level.  Magical would you not say? Will it matter what others think or say, I will answer wholeheartedly, Absolutely NOT! It is an incredible journey and yes, its life work! That may seem daunting but life work creates a better perspective for yourself.  Yes there will be parts of your present perspective that will fall off incredibly easier than others. I will admit incredibly worth it and when we start to live in our hearts you will start to see all the magic around you. 

Be Heart!   

Monika Torma

When we start to live in our hearts you will start to see the magic around you!

My name is Monika Torma and I was a victim of bullying.  I want to take a moment and speak to everyone about bullying. Primarily I want to address the bullied.  I know as a victim of bullying how it affects our lives and what a toll it takes on our confidence and many other aspects of our personalities and behaviors.  We, as the bullied, need to stand united and understand hurt people hurt and realize this is not our story!

I wish when I was young someone had taken the time to sit me down about this specific topic because I always felt when these words were being thrown at me, it was my true identity.  As I know many of you do now.  The first image is a depiction of some of the words I would hear often and I believed them.   As I aged and started to understand why bullies behave the way that they do, it was easier to change my perspective and put those words behind me.  Which is my wish for you, that you may be able to take those unkind words and put them behind you.  You are what is important here and this is my message. 

Now take the words in the second image and empower yourself because it is okay to have a healthy sense of self no matter what another person may say or think.  It is okay to enjoy your life even if it does not fit into what society has deemed is acceptable.  It is okay to be unique!  It is okay to be you! This is the time to empower yourself and each other! Our life is ours and we do have the right to be our authentic selves and recognize that they are doing the best that they know how.  When another person is bullying you, trust me when I say it is truly how they feel about themselves.  Sometimes I would imagine holding up a mirror as someone is yelling or criticizing me and I could see how they truly felt about themselves and I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. 

Now is the time to take our power back, to look at them with eyes wide open and forgive.  Yes, forgive! Many times I have been told are you crazy, forgive? Then, interestingly enough, when a person has had time to look at the situation from a calmer perspective they come back to me and say, “Wow, now I get it”.  Forgiveness is only for us and although it is hard to hear when emotions are running amuck it truly can bring peace to us without holding on to anger, shame and sense of self-loathing.  The worst thing that can happen here is that we too become them and then we continue the circle and start devouring ourselves.  Look, we are all human and we will make mistakes but now is the time for us to make our own choices and please do not let them devour the beautiful person you were meant to be. 

Let us band together and empower ourselves and each other one step at a time.  Come take my hand and join me to stop this together.  See the bullies for who they are and do everything in your power to not become them because that is what they want.  Say something! Do something! Talk to someone you trust.  Never feel alone because you are not.  Words DO have power and do not allow yourself to become your own bully.  Always realize and recognize we do have the power and a change needs to occur.  Let us begin!
Be Heart!   

Monika Torma